thanks but no thanks

This past weekend was a-mazing! It was Baylor’s 100th Homecoming Celebration. It was my first Homecoming as an alum and it made me miss Baylor and my Baylor friends more than anything. Although I’ve been to Baylor recently, just being there for homecoming was perfectly nostalgic and beautiful. I. Love. Baylor.

The day before Claire and I left for Waco, Cedar Valley called asking for my references, always a good sign. Turns out they called most if not all my references listed. Not only was I just having a great weekend, but there was a chance of employment once the weekend was over.
Homecoming: Baylorbound friends, Scotland friends, hall friends, former roommates, former bosses who are friends, FCC friends, church friends, former neighbors, old friends, re-connected friends, bonfire, good music, dancing, fireworks, good food and drinks, long parade, bad football, naps, Settlers of Cataan, kolaches from West, and Café Cappuccino. SO GOOD!

After returning home, I napped, showered, and went to rearrange my room. My room now has hard-wood floor instead of dirty, stained carpet. I took a break and got online. Checked my email and there it was… an email from Cedar Valley just waiting for me. It had been sent late Friday afternoon. I then remembered that I didn’t check it before I left, and it was a good thing that hadn’t. It was yet another rejection letter… really?!? Yep.

At least I didn’t read it before leaving for Waco. It may have put a damper on my weekend. I was so confident about this one; it was such a good fit. “Another candidate is better suited for the position.” I can’t imagine how someone else is more qualified or better suited… I just can’t. But I guess it’s not what God wants me to do either.

Dear God,

Please use me. I’m ready.

Love,
Elizabeth

G.D.

Name: Grover Diego

Age: 18 months

Sex: Male

Color: Shimmery Red

Grover Diego, my beautiful Beta fish, has been sick. He was overdue for a water change, but has been living swimmingly... until last Sunday. As Sunday night's church group was leaving, one of the ladies alerted me that Gover Diego was floating on his side and appeared dead. Dad tapped and shook the bowl. He eventually started moving...but he was so weak. I rushed to change his water and fed him a small amount of food. I monitored his progress throught the night and continued into the next day. He was having trouble swimming normally. He could only sink, float, or rely on his little plastic tree for support. My poor baby. Part of his little aquatic body kept skimming the surface of the water, like he couldn't really submerge himself. His swimming was laborious; he would flap his little fins so hard and couldn't get where he wanted to go... :-(

I played him his favorite song, Private Dancer by Tina Turner, and sang him the song I wrote and sang for him everyday when I got out of class and both lived in my dorm room. He liked that. He swam at little better. I think he's ready to move out of the kitchen area. Maybe he's tired of his new location. Grover Diego and I so similar. He has simple joys, likes good music, enjoys company, and likes change. Grover Diego entered my life a month after I returned from Scotland. He's charming and adorable, the best listener ever, and so brilliant both mentally and in color. He's the perfect Beta. I was so worried about his survival.

Thankfully after a few nights of rehabiliation, close monitoring, and intensive care, I'm proud to say that he has finally fully recovered. I was worried about losing a best friend but crisis averted. Sic 'em Grover Diego.

"Meet me at the fair."

Friday: hello, Nikki!!! Baylor does this whole Fall Break thing. It’s only one day, Friday, so not to be equated with Spring break, but as I recall, it's glorious all the same. I was so elated to get a call from Nikki saying should be in town to for break, and that we would hanging out. I am truly fond of all my friends, especially Nikki. That Friday evening, the two of us rode up together to Claire and Dana’s place for a small dinner party they were throwing. It was fun with delicious foods, delicious drinks, funny stories, and Patton doing his usual “business” on the floor. Afterwards, most guests were pretty tired, but I somehow always get re-energized at the end of the night. My hypothesis is that I absorb the entire room’s leftover energy, so while everyone else is ready to call it a night, I’m up for another round… I bet I get annoying.

Well, Dana had a little life in her, too, so we managed to convince Claire to come with us to Pete’s Piano bar. When we got there, it was full of OU and UT fans in town a night early before the next day’s big Red River Shootout football game at the Cotton Bowl. The majority of people were OU fans, and they paid about $150 to get their Boomer Sooner fight song played. That sounds like a mighty large amount of money until just two seasoned OSU women paid $200 for their Cowboy fight song. What the heck were OSU fans doing there anyway?!?! Then those very same two cougars started dancing on stage. The skinny gal began shaking and rubbing her butt along the piano, a new dance move I’d like to call “buffin’ it” since it appeared like she was buffing a newly washed grand piano with her hind parts. The other cougar, being much larger and wearing a stunning shiny black and gold tiger print blouse tried to seduce the pianists and shamelessly flashed them a boob. Little did she realize in her drunken state that the wall behind the piano is, in fact, one big mirror. The entire bar got a boob (at least those not yet in a completely drunken stupor). Those two probably won’t remember their debut performances, and that’s probably for the best. The rest of night progressed just as wildly. Another pair of boobs came out, a bride-to-be carrying a giant pink inflatable penis got some on-stage recognition, and finally, we conga-lined out the door (quite literally!) and went back home. Instead of going to sleep, the three of us attempted to learn the ho-down throw-down Miley Cyrus dance and posted a video of it on dear Nikki’s facebook wall.

The next day was all about the State Fair of Texas. This was my first time to go the State Fair of Texas and not just go to the Cotton Bowl for a football game. Bryan drove up from Waco to go with us. We parked at Victory Station near the American Airlines Center to catch the new Green Line to the Fair. It took almost an hour to get the 5 miles to the Park. The new DART rail was having some serious issues. But once there, we were greeted by Big Tex, and I got my first State Fair corny dog. Best.Corny.Dog.Ever! I finally got the chance to ride the huge Texas Star Ferris wheel! We also rode another ride called the X-Treme which was fun. We explored a science exhibit, ate fried peaches and cream (life-changing-ly delicious), fried oreos and a Belgium waffle, became Deputy Texas Hill wine tasters, went to the car show, saw African Acrobats, and left the fair by hailing a Taxi. Our taxi driver was a bit reckless and we mistakeningly told him to drop us off at the wrong spot which left us walking close to mile to the car, but it was still fun. Needless to say, it was a glorious and fantastic weekend.

"That's just what Baylor girls do."

*This is my second post of the day. I was going to combine two posts, but they’re better separate, so if you’re still interested in reading… scroll down to read the other new post below.

Today was my interview with Cedar Valley College. The position I interviewed for is a part-time position but with the office of student life. A friend from church, Kay, came by to drive me to the interview. I was a little nervous because I applied for this position about a month ago and on that day I applied to at least eight different jobs one right after the other. Basically I walked in not really remembering what position I was interviewing for.

I got there a little early and just sat for a few minutes, but then my curiosity got the best of me and I figured it would be beneficial to explore the student life center. I passed by a room where a few women were eating lunch, and just as I passed by, one of them popped her head out and said, “Hi. I’m guessing you’re Elizabeth. We’re in here.” It was still at least 15 minutes before noon, my scheduled interview time, and the conference table was still covered with the remains of their lunches. I apologized for being so early, but just as I said that, another woman walked in and said, “That’s just what Baylor girls do.” She had a big smile on her face when she said it, and the other women started giggling.

All the ladies introduced themselves and happily explained that I was the first interviewee there to represent Baylor University. The other lady was pretty excited that another bear was there, and believe me, so was I! I really think that the interview went well. I answered all the questions they asked me to the best of my ability. Every time I said, “while I was at Baylor…” it just sent one of my interviewers into a fit of giggles as she tried to do a sic ‘em. I joked and said that I feel like I should do a sic ‘em after I answer each question. They all laughed and smiled and continued to joke around.

I was really hoping that Travelers would call me before going to that interview with a job offer. I wasn’t looking forward to a part-time job, but after that interview, maybe that’s where I need to be. I don’t know. Only time can tell how everything will unfold. Well anyway, it was a great interview. The job would require maybe one night shift a week and possibly a few weekends. I may have to do a bit of travelling and I’d be trained to drive a 15 passenger van. Bring on the van! I would probably only work 18 hours a week, but I think it should all be really fun.

New Firsts

Monday was an exciting day for me. I acquired my driver’s license only a few months ago, so I’m a fairly new driver. My parents are tirelessly apprehensive about letting me drive, but I think I do just fine on the roads. They are especially cautious about letting me drive around Dallas. The highways are always so busy and traffic is rarely light. I once read an article listing cities in America with the worst and rudest drivers; Dallas ranked second behind New York… that sucks. Basically there is no such thing as southern hospitality on DFW highways and interstates. Monday was a big deal because both of my parents were off-work and headed to the State Fair which meant I had access to Mom’s car all day long. :-) I made plans to meet Richard at North Park Mall around lunchtime. Driving from home to North Park Mall requires taking I-20 to I-45/I-75. My parents were definitely worried, offering to just drop me off there, but I insisted that they let me do this.

Accompanied by Owl City’s (Click me! <- this'll get stuck in your head... but you'll like it) Ocean Eye's CD, I conquered the roads. I switched lanes, dodged traffic, merged, and exited here and there. It was fun. This was the first time that I was alone on the highways. Another first was parking in the parking garage… I think I’m a pro now. Heck yes.

North Park’s food court with Richard was great as always. We basically sat there trying to look like young professionals on their lunch break, but I doubt we fooled anybody. I think I reek of unemployment. Anyhow, we window shopped and I picked out the boots I’d buy if I had the money or a job. After admiring all the pretty things in the mall, we left for a small coffee shop called BuzzBrews. Their slogan: drink unto you Buzz. The coffee was delicious, strong, and only two buck for an endless supply. I would say that I’m their new biggest fan. After an entire afternoon of hanging out, it was time to part; however sadly that was rush hour. I also had to pee. My options were going southbound towards home or northbound to visit Claire. I figured that I would be able to get to Claire faster and able to use her facilities. Traffic was both ways, but at least it would promise more fun going north. So I then drove to I-75 to 635, more highway! I just love hanging out with Claire and Dana. I love those girls. The evening was going well until my mother intervened. Apparently she called my phone, but I was busy and didn’t hear it. She then proceeded to call Richard looking for me. Since I wasn’t with him, she got Claire’s number and called her. It was only about 10:30 PM and she was frantically calling all my friends about my whereabouts. I hadn’t planned on staying out late, but she was overly worried. I’m almost 22 and just had my mother call all my friends to tell me to come home because it was getting late… whelp that put a damper on my day out. Just another reason why I know I need to find a job and move out soon.

The Weekend

Nothing out of the ordinary has really happened since my last blog post. I do, however, have a renewed sense of confidence and a more fierce determination. I anxiously wait to hear back from the insurance company, but since then, I have set up an interview with Cedar Valley Community College to be a student coordinator. That sounds fun, too! It’s Wednesday at noon, and I hope it goes well.

The most interesting thing I’ve done lately was go to the Dallas Arboretum, and that was incredibly fun. Claire and I were thinking of fun weekend plans and wanted to include Julia. We pondered going to the state fair, but with Julia’s barista shift starting at 3 PM, it would be too expensive for such a short block of time. And then there was a sign… the Arboretum! Along Interstate 75, there stood a billboard for “Autumn at the Arboretum.” Weekend plans: made. The Dallas Arboretum is home to thousands of flowers, various trees, miniature houses, fountains, trails, gardens, and basically anything and everything beautiful that nature has to offer. After sleeping over at Julia’s new swanky apartment, meeting her new boyfriend (great guy), and hanging out with another Baylor alum, Rachel, the four of us swung by to get Claire and then a friend of Julia’s new boyfriend. [I hope that wasn’t confusing. Basically six awesome post grads/new friends are headed to the Arboretum.]

The pamphlets being peddled at the entrance advertised that inside were “over 40,000 pumpkins.” After walking through… I believed it. It was wonderful. So many pumpkins everywhere! I took a butt-load of pictures. Photographic evidence can be found when clicking the link. We played around the entire Arboretum as if we had all known each other since childhood, especially since we behaved like children. We jumped and skipped, rolled down the hill a few times, make a human pyramid, and made some rather small and youthful new friends. It was a fantastic Saturday afternoon or simply “botanical bliss” as Aaron called it.

Job??!!

After doing so much job hunting, Claire and I decided to go to Baylor last Tuesday for the Job Fair at the Ferrell Center. The last Baylor Job Fair that I attended was pretty lame. It was last spring semester and the Non-profit Job Fair. I had high hopes for it because Non-Profit Organizations really interest me; I would really love working for an organization or company that is geared towards making people a priority and making the world a better place besides just turning a profit. But bluntly put, that fair was crap. There were very few organizations in attendance and the few that were there didn’t actually have jobs to offer. So, naturally I was a bit skeptical, but also super nervous because so many other perspective employers had rejected or ignored me. I really did not want this job fair to be a dead end.

That Tuesday morning, Claire came to my house and we merrily left for Waco. We got there in time to meet the wonderful and lovely Nikki and Kelcy for lunch at Teriyaki Park. It was fantastic! I absolutely LOVE those girls. After lunch, we left for New Student Programs to visit some Baylor family members, receive some words of encouragement, and change into professional attire for the fair. After a few practice runs with Keane working on my (“Hi, I’m Elizabeth. Please hire me,” and*smile*) introduction, we were ready and headed to the Ferrell Center.

As we walked in, we encountered an old transfer student that we knew from Welcome Weekend, Bruke. He briefly wished us luck at the fair and told us that his life at Baylor has been fantastic. He then told us that we influenced his life and helped him get involved at Baylor. That made me feel really warm and fuzzy inside. I really made a difference. It gave me the extra boost of confidence I needed to walk into that room and pimp out my rockstar resume.

I went to many different tables and handed out more resumes than I expected. The Hastings table was one of my favorites. The chick recruiting was super cool. The job is in Amarillo so I’m not really interested in it, but it did make me think of this summer and my trip to see Cole in Amarillo filled with our almost daily Hastings/Roasters visits. Anyway, one of the tables that I forked over my resume to was Travelers Insurance Company. It seemed that all the reps there were Baylor Alumni, and after a brief conversation with the Manager, Chris, I was asked to meet him after the fair for an interview at Starbucks!! AAHHH!!! What a spur of the moment interview, but I accepted. :-)

By the time Claire and I left the Ferrell Center, it was time for my interview! She dropped me off at Starbucks. My heart was pounding and blood rapidly shooting through my veins. I thought that getting a Shaken Lemonade Tea would calm my nerves. Yea… I spilt it down my blouse. In the minutes I had left to panic, I tried to clean myself up. Luckily my blouse had some ruffles down the front that I could shift around to hide the largest of the tea stains. When he arrived we sat in Chili’s Too and interviewed for a full hour… or more. During the course of the hour, I answered most of his questions extremely well, while others… let’s just say I gave him a thumbs-up during the interview. If I had read a book about interviewing, I bet there would be a chapter providing a list of things NOT to do which would probably include giving your interviewer a thumbs-up. I also walked away without giving him that final good-bye handshake. Ugh. Despite the tea-stained blouse, thumbs-up hand gesture, and lack of a parting handshake, I was asked to come by the office on Friday to take an assessment test. Phew…

After the interview, I meet back up with Claire down in Keane’s office and the three of us headed off to dinner at Food For Thought. It was delicious and so good spending time with Papa Tarbell. Then it was off to meet the glorious, John K. at Common Grounds. Before we finished the night, Claire and I decided to make a trip to Braum’s for ice cream.

Something had happened at the job fair that had left me feeling a little crummy all day. As I explained it all to Claire, I couldn’t hold it in anymore… the water works came. I didn’t talk about this earlier, but one of the tables at the fair made me feel as if I were one inch tall. I stood there trying to explain and validate my International Studies degree only to have the recruiter from an international import/export company say, “Oh, that’s interesting. I’m sure that’ll be useful somehow.” I’m sure that she had no intentions of hurting my feelings or making me feel insignificant, but that’s exactly what she did. It bothered me through the entire fair, throughout my interview, through dinner, and even into coffee. Clearly, my other posts have explained how miserable being unemployed makes me feel. For months I have thought about my degree and what it means to me. I felt and still sometimes feel as if my degree was a bit worthless, especially in this economy, but after that recruiter’s statement, it really hit me that everyone else might think the same way, too. All these months of unsuccessful job searching! About 120,000 dollars later, I have a degree that no one cares about. Also, it wasn’t just that one recruiter that made me feel like an inch of worthless post-graduate poop; other tables were recruiting for specific majors like education, business, accounting, finance, engineering, and even psychology, but NOT one table looking was in search of an international studies major… big surprise there. It was just frustrating and heart-breaking walking around, and feeling so unwanted/un-needed/ hopeless.

I was actually too upset for ice cream that night. I was happy about my interview, but really… I never thought that getting a degree in international studies could potentially land me a job at an insurance agency. My heart is devoted to helping others, and I would love to travel overseas to help others. But I feel like I have been fighting with God since the middle of senior year. The things that I want to do, I can’t do or at least not yet. It feels as if I’m this untamed puppy trying to roam, but God has put me on a short leash. Maybe if I’m good here, I’ll be granted a bit of slack to go elsewhere. But like I mentioned before, I’m really just looking for any job at this point. I just need a salary and benefits. My short leash has left me with very few options.

When I finally got home that night, I found comfort in the arms of my mother. Nothing beats crying in your mom’s arms and letting her tell you everything will be okay. She assured me that my degree is real and not worthless. She assured me that I am not worthless. Thanks, Mom.


(Days pass… insert more rejection emails, boring days, and random happenings here.)


Friday arrived. I got the email from the company telling me where to go that morning. The office is in Richardson and less than two miles from my Dad’s office, so we carpooled together, and then I took the car to Travelers alone to take the assessment test. I was nervous about it. I knew little about the content or format, just that it was timed and would take about three hours. Well, I took it, and yes, it was indeed three hours long: some multiple-choice sections and some computer sections. Most of the test just insulted my intelligence; there was some matching, picking out accurate diagrams, grammar, basic math, writing, and a bit of typing. I started the test around 8:30 AM, and finally finished around 11:45 AM. When I finished, Teresa, the tester lady, asked if I could come back at 1 after lunch for another interview. Sure! I had lunch with my Dad at his company picnic, and when I returned I met with two managers this time and had an hour and half long interview followed by a peer interview where I sat with a claims rep at his desk and watched him work. He explained the job and the computer system as we clicked our way through the claims process. He was pretty nice, too. He was probably in his early twenties, American Studies major/ psychology minor, and hoping to one day advance to auto liability stuff. Eventually I was sent home…by that time it was 3:40 PM. I had been there ALL day. Since I was already in the area, I meet up with Claire to hang out. This was super convenient since I had planned on seeing her later anyway for her brother’s concert. Garrett, Claire’s brother, is super talented, so the concert was great. Jason came, too, and all of us hanging out turned out to be pretty dang awesome. Friday turned out to be a fantastic day.

After much grief, praying, the fair, misery, interviews, tests, and fun, the week ended and now I just have to wait for a few days to finally hear back about a job offer. I hope and pray that I get it. Getting this job would be such a big blessing for me, and I would really appreciate a paycheck. It seems like a decent job, something I could definitely do for awhile, ...or at least until I get things figured out and my leash gets lengthened. So, cheers to that.